WWW: Winter Wonderland Wedding

Mellon Arena: December 18, 2005. Trans Siberian Orchestra Rock Concert. While the musicians were jamming on stage, snow began falling from the ceiling. My guy turned to me and proposed. It was magical. I could not have asked for a more perfect proposal. I later learned that he had actually made a gigantic glow in the dark poster which said, "Marry Me, Christie?" He had purchased tickets for two of his students to sit across the arena but the staff refused to allow the sign to be brought in to the concert.

I considered using the proposal as the inspiration for our wedding theme. I began collecting ideas for a Winter Wonderland Wedding. Within a few months, I had a two inch thick binder with oodles of ideas and ten Rubbermaid containers of decor purchased. Like so many other brides, I changed my mind and went with a completely different theme.

Winter Wonderland Wedding Theme:

Colors: Bright Red, White, and Silver with accents of Evergreen
Bridal entrance song: Christmas Canon- Trans Siberian Orchestra
Ceremony music: Gospel Choir
Invitations: Snowflake embossed invitations
Favors/Place cards: Picture Snow globes or mini 2 inch tall Christmas trees
Menu: Comfort Foods with Hot cocoa bar
Attire: Fur trimmed capes for bride and maids, snowflake lace detailed bridal gown
Bouquets: Red roses with holly berries
Pew decor: Crystallized Grapevine baskets filled with red roses and holly
Ceiling decor: Glittery white and silver snowflakes
Other decor: Huge wreaths with crystallized branches, white lights and red and white bows, clear glass blocks filled with white lights, crystallized grapevine garland, crystallized grapevine flower girl baskets
Guestbook alternative: Ceramic ornaments with Paint markers
Transportation for bride and groom: Horse drawn carriage

*** Items in Bold I actually purchased during after Christmas sales and am selling- email me if interested at psychgalbride@yahoo.com***

Getting Organized: Your wedding planning essentials

Think back to that wonderful day your man proposed to you. You finally heard him say those fantastic four words, "Will you marry me?" Even before you could utter yes your mind was racing with thoughts of what time of year will we get married? who will be in my bridal party? and what will my gown look like? In the months leading up to your big day you will make a million little decisions. To keep you on track here are a few indispensable items every bride to be should have.

* A three ring binder - at least one inch thick...
* 100-200 clear page protectors to place magazine pictures, articles, and contracts
* A calendar with tons of room each day to write in appointments, vendor payment dates, and deadlines
* Highlighters in several shades- use to color code items on calendar
* Sheets of loose leaf paper to make lists
* Sticker tabs to categorize sections of binder
* Business card holder for three ring binder
* Zipper compartments for three ring binder (to place fabric samples of gowns)

Other items to place in binder include a timeline of what to do and when to do it. You can collect one from a magazine or download from the internet. As you progress in your planning, add a copy of your guest list, vendor contact information, copy of contracts, and registry information.

I don't particularly care for the traditional wedding planners sold in stores. I found that my handy binder and a book of lists worked much better for me. I highly recommend The Bride's Book of Lists: Things to Do & Questions to Ask by Amy Nebens. This little green book has it all. Vendor question lists, helpful hints, and directions for making a Bridal Emergency Kit are just a few of the features. It is even small enough to tuck into your purse. I literally did not leave home without it.

Program all your wedding related phone numbers directly into your cell phone. This will save you oodles of time. It may seem bothersome now but trust me you'll thank me later.

As you start purchasing the items for your wedding, allocate a particular space in your house or purchase Rubbermaid containers for you to keep your items. Be sure to keep a list of items purchased in your binder. Keep your receipts. I purchased a plastic coupon organizer to hold my receipts. This allowed for easy retrieval when I changed my mind and needed to return an item.

Lastly, remember to update your wedding binder regularly by removing pictures of things you changed your mind about, documenting purchases, and tracking your planning progress.

All I really need to know I learned while planning my wedding

If you haven't ever read Robert Fulghum's All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten I definitely recommend you pick up a copy. In his 1989 bestseller you are shown that true wisdom lies in the small things like: "Share everything. Play fair. Don't hit people. Put things back where you found them. Clean up your own mess. and Flush."

Here's the "wisdom" I gleaned from wedding planning:

• White and ivory are interchangeable. No one is going to care or even notice if your programs are white and your linens are ivory. Chill.
• Before you consider going to try on bridal gowns, be prepared to show your body to a lot of strange people. And remember to wear some decent underwear... no one else wants to see your thong!
• There will always be things that go wrong on "your day." There is no such thing as a perfect wedding. Contrary to the millions of magazine articles and books you have read. Use this as your new mantra. Repeat after me: There is no such thing as the perfect wedding... There is no....
• Bridezilla is *not* a term that you should aspire to being called.
• Just because you had a lovely wedding does not mean that you should quit your day job and become a wedding planner.
• Everyone loves the hokey pokey---Come on... you put your right foot in... you put your right foot out... Just because you put something on your DJ's do not play list does not mean that a million guests won't request it.

Ways to Save Money on your Wedding- Part 2

Just as I promised, here are more tips for saving money on your wedding!

Let's talk bridal attire. Don't spend a fortune on those cutesy Mrs. XXX sweatshirts, t-shirts, and undies. For much less you can make them yourself. If you can iron, you can handle this DIY project. The iron ons cost between $1- 6. Shoes: DSW! I got my $60 sequin shoes for $9.99! Filene's Basement is another great place to find quality shoes at reasonable prices. Jewelry: Each season department stores clearance their inventory and you can find beautiful necklace and earring sets for pennies! I bought my bridesmaids Swarovski crystal necklaces and earrings at Steinmart for less than $50. At Michaels craft store, I found Swarovski crystal kits to make photo bracelets for $7.99.

Bridal Beauty Bargains: I considered getting my teeth professionally whitened until I saw the prices. Fortunately you can get awesome results from the classic Crest Strips. Since I have sensitive teeth I only used them once daily rather than twice but the end result was remarkable. You can frequently find $5 off coupons online or in the Sunday paper for the strips. For the holidays, Target has a Crest bundle with whitening strips, toothpaste and mouthwash.

In my younger days I did some hair modeling for local salons. I'll share with you a trade secret: for deep conditioning skip the salon and head for Walmart. For less than $3 you can get Le Kair Cholesterol Strengthening and Conditioning Cream. Its a thick pink or yellow cream that you slather over your hair after shampooing, don a shower cap, and run warm water over your head. Rinse, style and be amazed at the silky softness of your tresses.

Spa pampering: Ssh, I'll let you in on another of my favorite secrets. Beauty schools. Instead of forking over $60 for a mani/pedi, grab your favorite gal pal and head for the nearest Empire or other beauty school.

Nails: Ever since my then fiance put that shiny rock on my left hand, I have been obsessed with keeping my nails looking perfect. I have a terrible habit of biting my nails so I spend the money to get full faux nails. I highly recommend "solar" or "pink and white" nails. These suckers are nearly indestructible. Unlike a traditional acrylic tip that needs to be painted, these nails are instantly french manicured. No need to paint or wait for them to dry! As you might suspect, they are on the pricey side- full set for $50 but you can go three weeks without needing to get them filled. Plus- if you are anything like me- you will never have to worry about chipping a nail again. Now if you are lucky enough to grow out your natural nails, here's a money saving tip for you. Purchase a DIY acrylic nail kit. Place 2-3 drops of the liquid acrylic into a bottle of clear top coat. This will not only strengthen your nails but also lengthen your manicure.

Gown Shopping reality

Gown shopping. The happiest and most sad days of my life. I was thrilled to be shopping for a wedding gown but completely blindsided by the fact that unless you are a size 4 you will not be able to actually try on gowns in "regular" boutiques or even be welcomed. I tried on gowns at about six stores. The first was the notorious David's Bridal- home of the plus size bride. I knew that they would have dresses in "my size" and that they would not be snotty. Other plus size brides had suggested this being my first stop because you can find what styles look best on your figure. ***News flash*** Not every plus size bride has to wear an a-line, long sleeved ugly frock with the side ruching. My second stop was at a local boutique where staff smiled to my face but giggled and whispered behind my back. Needless to say I did not find my dream gown there. The middle aged woman who wore way too much makeup simply held a few gowns up against me and said something about how she could order one of these gowns in MY size. But it would have to be paid in full before it was ordered and it was nonreturnable. So- let me get this straight. I am suppose to choose the most expensive piece clothing I will ever buy only after seeing a much smaller version of the gown being held up to me. Yeah right. I was outta there!

Third store was another well known mega bridal store: Alfred Angelo. Again, I knew they would have at least a few gowns I could actually try on. The women who worked in these stores actually treated me like a valued customer. I braved a "trunk show" at the next store, that sold exclusively Demetrios gowns. This is where I encountered the worst discrimination. Although this designer advertises that his gowns are designed to fit up to a size 24, he obviously does not actually want plus size women buying his gowns. I had the pleasure (cough cough) of meeting one of the designers. He spent about five minutes sharing how he could change this or that on the gown to accommodate my larger size then he was off to spend his time with the "pretty thin brides." The ones who got the oohs and aahs and had three or four different sales ladies dancing around them bringing them gown after gown. It was far too much for me to handle. I got dressed and marched myself out of the store never to return. I took a month off before daring to enter another bridal store. As I pulled into the parking lot of MB Bride, I said a prayer. Please God let me have the strength to endure any criticisms I receive and not allow their words to crush me. Immediately entering this store, I knew things were different. The consultant walked me back to a large section of the store that held all plus size gowns. There were at least 15 gowns of each size. It was amazing. The gowns weren't the traditional plus size frocks I was getting sick of seeing. They were beautiful and unique. It took less than ten minutes for me to find "The Gown." Before I had even tried it on, I knew that was my gown. The designer, 2Be Bride, purposely does not over advertise their gowns. Only a select number of stores carry this designer. They do not design solely for the plus size bride but by far has the best grasp on making the plus size bride not feel plus sized. My gown was everything I had ever dreamed of. I did not have to sacrifice anything because I wasn't a size 4.

Ways to Save Money on your Wedding- Part 1

When I say 'save money on your wedding' I am instantly transformed to the part of Father of the Bride where Steve Martin finds his onscreen daughter asleep on the couch gripping a bridal magazine article about having a budget wedding. The tacky suggestions of having a friend bake a cake and another take pictures softened the heart of miserly Mr. Banks. Soon Annie was on her way to the outlandishly expensive wedding planner and his money started to fly.

I am living proof that you can have that fairy tale wedding without going into debt. My husband and I made a list of our priorities. We quickly decided that the money would be spent on what was most important to us. Food was our number one priority and we went all out. But there are hundreds of ways to save on the catering bill. Eliminating little things add up. Don't be afraid to ask for discounts or less expensive alternatives. If you don't ask, you'll never know. Never assume that a buffet will be less expensive than a sit down dinner. This is a huge wedding fallacy. It all depends on what food is served. If you have your heart set on having a sit down dinner, you can make it happen. It will simply take some creativity on the caterers part.

Decor: Here is where I saved a ton of money. I DIY all of my wedding decor. I handmade the silk centerpieces, pomander balls, placecard table arrangement, flower girl baskets, table number stands, sweetheart table cascading arrangement, wish bowl, and arbor swag. I had two initial appointments with my florist. At my first meeting I showed her pictures of the types of flowers I wanted in my centerpieces and bouquets. After receiving an estimate of $ 95-135 per centerpiece, she did not think she would see me again. Two months later, I arrived for my second appointment with a silk centerpiece I had made for less than $40. I had cut my floral bill in half and was able to have the more expensive, rare stems I desired in my bouquets. Additionally, the items can now be sold and I can recoup some money.

For table numbers I just happened upon these black iron gate photo frames that matched the venue's wine cellar iron gates perfectly. I found a book of Tuscany at a closeout store, cut the pictures from the book, and added a stenciled number to the book picture. Total price of project for 20 table frames less than $ 100.

I dislike those cheesy white silk flower girl baskets and refused to buy any. Instead I found beautiful tan wicker baskets at Pat Catans with an ivory cloth lining for $ 2.00 a piece. I hot glued some floral accents to the front and for less than $ 10 I had two one of a kind gorgeous flower girl baskets.

Paper Products:
Just like Sandra Lee has her Semi-homemade meals, I have my semi-homemade wedding paper projects. My wedding programs came from a kit I found at a super discount store called Marc's. (2.99 for 50 kit) I used Microsoft Publisher to create my program and printed it out at the local Kinkos. Since my entire first page was a shade of burgandy which took a TON of ink, so it was a bargain at 1.00 per program.

I purchased several of the Anna Griffin items at Michaels with the infamous 40% off coupon. I used the simple ivory Menu cards and the green floral accented place cards. Target also sells a similiar coordinating line from Anna Griffin. I purchased matching Thank you notes, 4.99 for 50.

I chose not to DIY my invitiations but searched the internet for the best price and discount. I ulimately found a 40% off Carlson Craft coupon that significantly discounted my invitation order. Never ever buy from a Hallmark or other card store. You can find any invitation online at a much better price.

Attire: Since 3 of 4 of my bridesmaids were married with two small children, I did not want to burden them with an expensive gown. I found an Impressions gown that I just loved and sought to find the lowest price. MB Bride, where I purchased my bridal gown, agreed to match the price I was quoted by Netbride.com. This was an easy task that saved my bridesmaids more than $ 50 a piece. If your BM gowns are long, please don't make them where the same shoes. Give them the option to wear any black shoe they feel comfortable in. No one wants to buy a pair of shoes they don't like, are not comfortable, and will not match anything else in their wardrobes.

You told me so!

I received the best wedding gift in the mail today. It was a CD of precious moments taken on the wedding day by my friend Melinda and her husband Craig. It allowed me to see what my guests saw and hear what my guests heard. I chuckle because the lovely string quartet hit some incredibly sour notes throughout the processional. One month ago, the thought of this would have devastated me. I would have been wrapped up in a ball in my bed, crying my eyes out, and proclaiming the world being over because my wedding wasn't perfect. Think Bridezilla. Fortunately for me and my darling new husband, once we were married I reclaimed my sanity. My married friends tried to tell me. But I was stubborn and wouldn't listen. "You'll look back and laugh at everything that went wrong..." those wise wedded women tried to tell me. It cracks me up to think about how I nearly had a meltdown each time I had to make a decision for the wedding. "Oh no... my Mikasa favors have been discontinued!" I shrieked like World War III had just broken out. I fretted over the most ridiculous things: the texture of silk rose petals, the shade of burgundy used to tint the icing roses on my cake, and what shoes my bridesmaids wanted to wear under their gowns. So, I'll say it... I know you have all been waiting. You were right. None of it mattered. The day was 'perfect' because we got married not because I opted for the higher quality silk rose petals.

Is there life after....

For the past twenty months, I have spent endless hours perusing bridal magazines, reading bridal books, chatting on the knot, creating a wedding website, registrying, designing centerpieces, buying items, researching venues, calligraphing envelopes, writing thank yous, and making tens of thousands of minor decisions for one little day: October 12th. Well, it came... and went. It was perfect. The venue was stunning, the ceremony was heartfelt, my husband was incredibly sexy! and the party was extraordinary. The compliments started from the day I showed my friends and family my big ol' wedding planning binder and haven't slowed down. Most importantly I am married to my soulmate and we will forever face life challenges together as one. But here's my question... is there life after wedding planning???